When we’re obsessed with to-do list ticking, the idea of doing nothing can fill us with dread. The very idea of free time feels alien. So imposing a little bit of structure on it can make it feel easier – and ensure that we actually prioritise it.

What does that actually look like? It’s about scheduling in an hour (or 20 minutes, if that feels like too much at first) free, relaxing time the same way you would any work or social commitment. You stick it in your calendar or diary, mark out that time as ‘busy’, and if anyone asks you to do anything else, you say, “Sorry, I can’t, because I’m doing something. ” Because yes, your free time is something.

What you do with that time is up to you, but if we were to impose some hard rules, they’d go something like this. No catching up on work. No doing life admin. No errands or chores. No things that you feel like you ‘should’ be doing, but that you actually really don’t fancy. Schedule in a window each week that’s entirely yours, to spend how you like.

Holmes has some additional suggestions: “Be intentional about the activities you spend your time on, and pay attention during your important activities — especially those that offer joy. Make these times no-phone zones. Overall, your goal is to maximise the amount of time that feels worthwhile and minimise the amount of time that feels like a waste. Time spent cultivating your relationships and your emotional wellbeing is absolutely worthwhile.”

Why you should start scheduling in free time